Pride goeth before the fall...

I looked it up. That quote is in fact an actual biblical quote (Proverbs 16:18) . Instead one of the many sayings that gets attributed to the Bible.

That is my key verse for today...It was the worse day I have had in a long, long time. By the end of the day, I lost my temper and was so mad that my heart was beating and I could breathe. I had to go to Mr. Across-the-hall-neighbor to calm down. I *never* go across the hall to calm down.

2nd period - J, who I have been having some problems with, tells me when I accidently called out the wrong answer for the test question that I need to just stop and think about it because I am confusing him. Ok, that doesn't sound so bad now, it was the tone, but I tell him that he shouldn't criticize me, I never said I was perfect. He continues talking so I send him to the hall. Basically he tells me that he is bored in class because I am not prepared and he sits around a lot. I really want to tell him that there are 25 kids in class, all of whom need special attention and he needs to learn patience. What I do tell him is that he is 18 and I have a master's degree and he needs to just accept that I know more about teaching than he does and that I am not perfect, human, and I do make mistakes. I was furious. I am getting together the entirety of the work for the six weeks and letting him work on it himself. He can sit in the back and speed along at his own pace. After school when I mentioned that I had a bad day, mijo asked me to tell him who it was, "come on, just tell me. I want to know." from a kid who is not violent at all, it was kinda flattering that he would want to stand up for me.

6th & 7th we had an instructional meeting with head honcho from downtown. In these meetings there is sort of an unwritten code that we stand firm with each other and say what we have done to help the students. Last year the lady called us all down individually for our failure rates, told us all students should have a textbook (even though the curriculum doesn't even have a textbook in some cases. we would leave really feeling bad. well, I was incredibly nervous cause stuff like that always makes me nervous, but I got through my part and my friend from down the hall even threw my name in because she did a walk-through in my room this morning. it was going really, really well.

Then the new teacher's turn came round. She basically laid it out that the students didn't know anything and she was starting over from step one and since she had only been there 3 weeks, she didn't know what she could really do before the state standarized test. And since her kids are exit level, she is just doing the best she can. "they don't know metaphors or similes or even what dialogue is." Ok, not only did I teach LOTS of these kids last year, I also teach 85 of them this year...And they do know stuff. I can't believe she got up in a meeting with people from downtown and said that they didn't. Like we hadn't taught them anything the last 11 years they've been in school!

Now I've been told that I shouldn't take it personally, true, because she didn't know her audience and no one was sitting there thinking, "hey who taught those kids last year?"

Then I walk back up the stairs, steaming...to find my 7th period class trapsing out of my room two minutes before the bell. Apparently the sub that was covering my class that class period got tired of them and decided to let them go early rather than fight with them about it. Shame really, she seemed like a good sub. She definitely knew better. Well I start ranting at them to get themselves back into the classroom. Then I got every kid in the class back in their seats and tore them up and down about even thinking about leaving early. Then I kicked out the kid who had already been in my class 4th and decided to come again. After school another kid said they had thought about staying in my room too. I told him that he had better be glad he didn't.

By the time I got up there I was so angry that my heart was beating and I almost couldn't breathe. I made them stay a full minute after the bell to make up for the time they were going to cut out early. They will hear it from me tomorrow, too.